I\u2019ve discussed the importance of taking control of our thoughts, but what can we do about temperament?<\/p>\n
We\u2019re born with personality traits that continue developing as we grow. During my young years, I was outgoing and friendly\u2014positive traits that overshadowed any forewarning of troublesome habits in the making.<\/p>\n
My personality proved an asset when I began writing for the newspaper, shortly before marrying my high-school sweetheart. After finishing college, I joined the full-time news staff. Being a people-person, I thrived on the excitement of interviews and interaction that brought new friends into my life.<\/p>\n
I excelled under pressure\u2014even found it stimulating. I interviewed celebrities, shook hands with President Richard Nixon, won awards, and wrote my first book at age twenty-four. Four years later I left the newspaper to be a stay-at-home mom, ecstatic and idealistic about the greatest adventure of my life.<\/p>\n
Negative personality traits made a surprise appearance.<\/strong><\/h3>\nWithout the accountability of a time clock and a daily plan, I had no organization or self-discipline. I felt overwhelmed and angry with myself for not measuring up to my accustomed level of performance. What happened to that successful young journalist who had it all together?<\/p>\n
Discouragement sent me searching for solutions and eventually to Dr. Tim LaHaye\u2019s book, Understanding the Male Temperament.<\/em> I thought understanding my husband would help me become the perfect wife. I didn\u2019t expect to see my flaws and limitations exposed.<\/p>\nDr. LaHaye said temperament\u2014a combination of traits we receive from our parents\u2014has a profound influence on behavior. He described four basic temperaments: Sanguine, Choleric, Melancholy, and Phlegmatic. My personality had a name, Sanguine, with these strengths\u2014outgoing, friendly, talkative, and carefree. He nailed my weaknesses\u2014undisciplined, weak-willed, restless, disorganized, unproductive, undependable, fearful, and insecure.<\/p>\n
Processing this information, I realized lack of discipline explains why Sanguines tend to be overweight and run a little late. Insecurity causes us to be people-pleasers who seek approval and have trouble saying \u201cno.\u201d Our deep emotions make us sentimental even about things of little value.<\/p>\n
I was a mess\u2026and I didn\u2019t like myself.<\/strong><\/h3>\nBut I could blame my weaknesses on temperament.<\/p>\n
The other temperaments also have weaknesses, but their strengths usually dominate. Dr. LaHaye listed Choleric strengths: strong-willed, decisive, practical, optimistic, courageous, confident. He said Melancholies are analytical, perfectionist, idealistic, self-sacrificing, self-disciplined. Phlegmatic traits include efficient, organized, dependable, practical.<\/p>\n
I learned most of us are a blend of at least two temperaments, and strengths of one temperament may cancel weaknesses of the secondary temperament. Predominantly Sanguine, I took another look and noticed my strengths have nothing to do with getting things done. My strengths involve relationships and emotions, not productivity. Both Sanguine weaknesses (undisciplined, disorganized) and strengths (talkative, carefree) can be exasperating for other temperaments.<\/p>\n
I wanted to change temperaments. After sufficient grieving over my inadequacies, I had to accept that God created me with my particular personality for a purpose. My strengths had been an advantage, and God assured me he could do something about my weaknesses.<\/p>\n
Temperament may explain our weaknesses, but it doesn\u2019t excuse them.<\/strong><\/h3>\nTemperament may explain our weaknesses, but it doesn\u2019t excuse them. <\/a><\/span>Click To Tweet<\/a><\/span>\nBlowing them off with a flip \u201cthat\u2019s just the way I am\u201d doesn\u2019t lead to responsible living. I\u2019ve made two observations: the greater the strengths the greater the weaknesses, and the natural temperament left to itself becomes worse and worse. Our only hope to strengthen weaknesses is total reliance on the power of Christ.<\/p>\n
What do you think about yourself? When you look in the mirror, do you mutter unkind words about your appearance? \u201cYou\u2019re so fat!\u201d \u201cYou don\u2019t look nearly as good as you thought you did!\u201d<\/p>\n
Would you make those rude comments to a friend? Or even a stranger?<\/p>\n
Throughout the day, do you engage in self-bashing, belittling yourself for mistakes or failure to live up to your own expectations?<\/p>\n
For most of my life I fought low self-esteem, feelings of inferiority, and insecurity\u2014three cronies that battered me into believing I didn\u2019t measure up.<\/p>\n
Don\u2019t you think it\u2019s time we treat ourselves with as much courtesy as a stranger? Can\u2019t we give ourselves a little grace concerning our imperfections?<\/p>\nIt\u2019s time we treat ourselves with courtesy and give ourselves grace concerning our imperfections. <\/a><\/span>Click To Tweet<\/a><\/span>\nStop the self-bashing! Speak truth to yourself!<\/strong><\/h3>\n
Dr. LaHaye said temperament\u2014a combination of traits we receive from our parents\u2014has a profound influence on behavior. He described four basic temperaments: Sanguine, Choleric, Melancholy, and Phlegmatic. My personality had a name, Sanguine, with these strengths\u2014outgoing, friendly, talkative, and carefree. He nailed my weaknesses\u2014undisciplined, weak-willed, restless, disorganized, unproductive, undependable, fearful, and insecure.<\/p>\n
Processing this information, I realized lack of discipline explains why Sanguines tend to be overweight and run a little late. Insecurity causes us to be people-pleasers who seek approval and have trouble saying \u201cno.\u201d Our deep emotions make us sentimental even about things of little value.<\/p>\n
I was a mess\u2026and I didn\u2019t like myself.<\/strong><\/h3>\nBut I could blame my weaknesses on temperament.<\/p>\n
The other temperaments also have weaknesses, but their strengths usually dominate. Dr. LaHaye listed Choleric strengths: strong-willed, decisive, practical, optimistic, courageous, confident. He said Melancholies are analytical, perfectionist, idealistic, self-sacrificing, self-disciplined. Phlegmatic traits include efficient, organized, dependable, practical.<\/p>\n
I learned most of us are a blend of at least two temperaments, and strengths of one temperament may cancel weaknesses of the secondary temperament. Predominantly Sanguine, I took another look and noticed my strengths have nothing to do with getting things done. My strengths involve relationships and emotions, not productivity. Both Sanguine weaknesses (undisciplined, disorganized) and strengths (talkative, carefree) can be exasperating for other temperaments.<\/p>\n
I wanted to change temperaments. After sufficient grieving over my inadequacies, I had to accept that God created me with my particular personality for a purpose. My strengths had been an advantage, and God assured me he could do something about my weaknesses.<\/p>\n
Temperament may explain our weaknesses, but it doesn\u2019t excuse them.<\/strong><\/h3>\nTemperament may explain our weaknesses, but it doesn\u2019t excuse them. <\/a><\/span>Click To Tweet<\/a><\/span>\nBlowing them off with a flip \u201cthat\u2019s just the way I am\u201d doesn\u2019t lead to responsible living. I\u2019ve made two observations: the greater the strengths the greater the weaknesses, and the natural temperament left to itself becomes worse and worse. Our only hope to strengthen weaknesses is total reliance on the power of Christ.<\/p>\n
What do you think about yourself? When you look in the mirror, do you mutter unkind words about your appearance? \u201cYou\u2019re so fat!\u201d \u201cYou don\u2019t look nearly as good as you thought you did!\u201d<\/p>\n
Would you make those rude comments to a friend? Or even a stranger?<\/p>\n
Throughout the day, do you engage in self-bashing, belittling yourself for mistakes or failure to live up to your own expectations?<\/p>\n
For most of my life I fought low self-esteem, feelings of inferiority, and insecurity\u2014three cronies that battered me into believing I didn\u2019t measure up.<\/p>\n
Don\u2019t you think it\u2019s time we treat ourselves with as much courtesy as a stranger? Can\u2019t we give ourselves a little grace concerning our imperfections?<\/p>\nIt\u2019s time we treat ourselves with courtesy and give ourselves grace concerning our imperfections. <\/a><\/span>Click To Tweet<\/a><\/span>\nStop the self-bashing! Speak truth to yourself!<\/strong><\/h3>\n
Blowing them off with a flip \u201cthat\u2019s just the way I am\u201d doesn\u2019t lead to responsible living. I\u2019ve made two observations: the greater the strengths the greater the weaknesses, and the natural temperament left to itself becomes worse and worse. Our only hope to strengthen weaknesses is total reliance on the power of Christ.<\/p>\n
What do you think about yourself? When you look in the mirror, do you mutter unkind words about your appearance? \u201cYou\u2019re so fat!\u201d \u201cYou don\u2019t look nearly as good as you thought you did!\u201d<\/p>\n
Would you make those rude comments to a friend? Or even a stranger?<\/p>\n
Throughout the day, do you engage in self-bashing, belittling yourself for mistakes or failure to live up to your own expectations?<\/p>\n
For most of my life I fought low self-esteem, feelings of inferiority, and insecurity\u2014three cronies that battered me into believing I didn\u2019t measure up.<\/p>\n
Don\u2019t you think it\u2019s time we treat ourselves with as much courtesy as a stranger? Can\u2019t we give ourselves a little grace concerning our imperfections?<\/p>\nIt\u2019s time we treat ourselves with courtesy and give ourselves grace concerning our imperfections. <\/a><\/span>Click To Tweet<\/a><\/span>\nStop the self-bashing! Speak truth to yourself!<\/strong><\/h3>\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/diannebarker.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/Book-cover.jpg?resize=225%2C300&ssl=1\")
<\/a><\/p>\n